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The Fringe has come round aagain

 
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trentvoyager
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PostPosted: Tue Aug 19, 2014 9:32 am    Post subject: The Fringe has come round aagain  Reply with quote

Some of the finalists for funniest joke of the Fringe Festival 2014

1."I've decided to sell my Hoover... well, it was just collecting dust" - Tim Vine.

2."I've written a joke about a fat badger, but I couldn't fit it into my set" - Masai Graham.

3."Always leave them wanting more, my uncle used to say to me. Which is why he lost his job in disaster relief" - Mark Watson.

4."I was given some Sudoku toilet paper. It didn't work. You could only fill it in with number ones and number twos" - Bec Hill.

5."I wanted to do a show about feminism. But my husband wouldn't let me" - Ria Lina.

6."Money can't buy you happiness? Well, check this out, I bought myself a Happy Meal" - Paul F Taylor.

7."Scotland had oil, but it's running out thanks to all that deep frying" - Scott Capurro.

8."I've been married for 10 years, I haven't made a decision for seven" - Jason Cook.

9."This show is about perception and perspective. But it depends how you look at it" - Felicity Ward.
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The Boyg
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PostPosted: Tue Aug 19, 2014 9:48 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

No3 was the one that made me laugh out loud.
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trentvoyager
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PostPosted: Tue Aug 19, 2014 10:12 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Me too.

No. 8 left me stone cold unsmiling.
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IvyOwl
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PostPosted: Tue Aug 19, 2014 1:50 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

No. 8 reminded me of the answer I always get from my those of my female friends who've had long and seemingly happy marriages.

"I've made all the major decisions but in such a way as he thinks it's him that's made them"!
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trentvoyager
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Location: Nottingham, United Kingdom

PostPosted: Mon Sep 01, 2014 12:09 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

More from Edinburgh:

1.Rob Auton - "I heard a rumour that Cadbury is bringing out an oriental chocolate bar. Could be a Chinese Wispa."

2.Alex Horne - "I used to work in a shoe-recycling shop. It was sole-destroying."

3.Alfie Moore - "I'm in a same-sex marriage... the sex is always the same."

4.Tim Vine - "My friend told me he was going to a fancy dress party as an Italian island. I said to him 'Don't be Sicily'."

5.Gary Delaney - "I can give you the cause of anaphylactic shock in a nutshell."

6.Phil Wang - "The Pope is a lot like Doctor Who. He never dies, just keeps being replaced by white men."

7.Marcus Brigstocke - "You know you are fat when you hug a child and it gets lost."

8.Liam Williams - "The universe implodes. No matter."


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